Chapter 18: A Benevolent Father and Filial Son, A Scene of Utter Chaos

The carriage arrived in front of the Ganlu Palace and slowly came to a halt.

"Your Highness, we have arrived," Jiang Qu said, letting go of the reins and turning to look at the Second Prince, whose eyes were still moist with tears from when he had just awakened.

"Mhm." Li Kuan responded with a low murmur, then hopped off the carriage.

"You may go back. Oh, that’s right—accompany me on another trip in two days," Li Kuan instructed Jiang Qu.

"Understood." Jiang Qu, who had stepped down before him, nodded with a smile. As he watched Li Kuan walk away, he let out a soft sigh.

At this moment, a young eunuch had already come forward to take the carriage away. Jiang Qu stood where he was, watching Li Kuan stride into the Ganlu Palace, his mind filled with complex thoughts.

What exactly was the "trump card" His Highness spoke of?

It was truly a question worth deep contemplation.

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Inside the Ganlu Palace, Li Kuan, returning late, ran straight into Li Er, who had come to the palace to dine with his wife and children.

His eldest brother, Li Chengqian, was not there; at this hour, he was likely still busy with his studies under the tutelage of the great Confucian scholars.

"Second Brother!" Li Tai, holding a small chicken drumstick in each hand, was eating with gusto. However, his gaze had been fixed on the palace entrance, so he was the first to notice Li Kuan when he walked in.

"Xiao Tai, eat less meat..." Li Kuan frowned as he looked at his younger brother’s greasy double chin, feeling a touch of concern.

Although it was said that the Tang Dynasty would eventually favor plumpness as a sign of beauty, if Li Tai were to grow morbidly obese, it would ultimately be detrimental to his health.

"You've returned?" Li Er sat upright at the head of the table, with Empress Zhangsun beside him, watching her son’s late return with a tender gaze.

"Yeah." Li Kuan nodded and sat down at his own table in a carefree manner—everyone was eating at separate tables today.

This was one of the things Li Kuan disliked about Li Shimin. Couldn't you just stay away, you old fogey? Every time you turn a family dinner into something resembling a morning court session with all those stuffy rules, it really ruins the mood.

"Kuan-er, are you satisfied with your villa?" Empress Zhangsun had always doted on Li Kuan.

"It's alright. Oh, fish sashimi! Second Brother thanks you, Changle." After sitting down, his younger sister Changle had her maid bring the fresh carp silver-thread sashimi from her own table to Li Kuan. Naturally, the young girl knew her second brother’s tastes better than anyone.

"Second Brother, eat more." Seeing her brother bow to her in a mockingly formal manner, the young girl couldn't help but cover her mouth and giggle.

It should have been a heartwarming scene between siblings, but someone just had to ruin the atmosphere.

"Hmph, you little brat, do you know that in the court today, my ministers nearly came to blows because of you?" Li Er said with a darkened face, deciding it was time to discipline his unruly son.

"Give me a break," Li Kuan curled his lip. "Father, stop trying to trick me. I’ve been very well-behaved lately. I didn't drop ants into Minister Pei's wine bowl, nor did I sneak into the Wude Palace to steal your prized weapons to play with. Because of me? Why?"

"You skipped school! And you brazenly had Chang He open the palace gates early right in front of the ministers! What kind of decorum is that?!" Li Er was so infuriated by his son that he nearly struck him. Last time, this little brat had snuck into the Wude Palace and "borrowed" his collection—a five-stone fine bow captured from Wang Shichu. When he found out and sent someone to look for Li Kuan, the boy had arrived at the Taiji Palace empty-handed and nonchalant, telling him that while shooting birds in the Imperial Garden, he had accidentally dropped the bow into the imperial lake.

Upon hearing that tragic news, the then-Emperor Li Er had first flushed red, then his eyes had turned bloodshot...

But there was no help for it. If a bow was lost, one could fish it out; if a son was lost...

Actually, one could always have more.

As these thoughts raced through his mind, Li Er looked at Empress Zhangsun beside him and decided to make an effort tonight.

At the lower table, Li Kuan, unaware of his father’s "post-prandial" thoughts, was angered by Li Er’s words.

"Whack!" Li Kuan slammed his hand on the table, stood up, and shouted, "Damn it! Which grandson went behind my back to tattle on me? Why didn't they come to me directly?!"

"Kuan-er!" Seeing her son lose his temper so easily, Empress Zhangsun was displeased by his recklessness. "You child... why is your temperament so violent?"

"No, Mother..." Li Kuan looked at Empress Zhangsun, feeling aggrieved, and pointed at Li Er. "Who do I go through all this trouble for? If others don't know, does Father not know? I didn't skip class to go play! I haven't even had a few sips of water all day, let alone eaten! I just got back, and now I have to hear this upsetting news. How can I not be angry?!"

"Second Brother is right! Father doesn't know how to be considerate!" As Li Er’s "little cotton-padded jacket," Changle stood firmly on Li Kuan’s side.

"Changle!" Li Tai realized that the War of the Gods was about to erupt and that he and his sister were not qualified to participate. He quickly rose from his seat, went to Changle, and pulled her toward the door. "Come, accompany Fourth Brother for a walk."

After Li Tai dragged Changle away, Li Er, who had been stunned and saddened by his daughter’s defection, glared at his son—who looked like a fighting cock—and spoke slowly: "Wei Zheng originally wanted to stop your carriage, but it was Dou Shilun who held him back."

"Uncle Dou?" Li Kuan realized in an instant. His grandmother had repeatedly warned him when he was young about whom he should turn to for help when he got into trouble.

Dou Shilun’s name was among them.

"Wei Zheng is just bored!" Realizing that he had likely been targeted by that "human mirror," Li Kuan could only resign himself to his bad luck. But he felt unconvinced. "Why does he stare at me every day? There are so many things in the court waiting to be handled. Is it interesting for Lord Wei to pick on a child like me all day?"

"He isn't picking on you; he is picking on your father." Seeing the tension between father and son ease slightly, Empress Zhangsun took the opportunity to guide the conversation, trying to focus the conflict on Wei Zheng.

"Really?" Li Kuan, who had been planning to gather some men to put a sack over Wei Zheng’s head later, looked at Li Er with hesitation.

"Hmph, do you think you’re worthy of being targeted by Wei Zheng?" Li Er sneered, his tone filled with an unconscious, haughty pride.

Li Kuan looked at his father, speechless.

Have you been sprayed stupid by that big mouth Wei Zheng? I’m the one being implicated by this madman because of you, and you’re proud of it?

Forget it, not worth arguing about.

"Fine," Li Kuan sighed. "I won't give Wei Zheng any trouble, but Father, shouldn't you apologize to me?"

"What did you say?" Li Er’s eyes widened, and Empress Zhangsun reached up to support her forehead.

"You said it yourself," Li Kuan looked at Li Er with feigned grievance. "I’m not worthy of being kept in Lord Wei's mind, but it was because of you that he wanted to find trouble with me and then blame you for it. By that logic, shouldn't you apologize to me? After all, for me, this was purely an unprovoked disaster..."

Li Er stared at Li Kuan in astonishment, taking a long moment to recover.

Fine, fine, fine. So that's how you want to play, is it?

Li Er slowly stood up. "Kuan-er, you make a good point. Come here to Father, and Father will apologize to you."

As he spoke, Li Er gave a subtle look to the eunuch Hong San, who was guarding the door.

"Father, look at what you’re saying..." A smug smile appeared on Li Kuan’s face, but the smile had barely reached his lips when, in the next instant...

"Creak... bang." Behind Li Kuan, the doors of the Ganlu Palace were slammed shut.

"Er-lang," Empress Zhangsun glanced helplessly at her son, then turned to her husband and whispered a plea: "Don't be too heavy-handed."

"I know what I'm doing." Li Er nodded solemnly. It was rare to get Guanyin-bi to sit on the sidelines, so he certainly had to exercise some restraint.

"Mother... what do you mean by that?" Li Kuan trembled, looking for a corner to hide from the impending storm.

"Boy," Li Er waited until Empress Zhangsun had shaken her head, sighed, and disappeared behind the screen. He stopped pretending. Always one to favor surprise attacks, Emperor Li Er rushed forward in two strides, barefoot, grabbed his son, and with one swift motion, pinned him across his lap, where he had already braced his stance.

"Ugh..." Before Li Kuan could figure out what was happening, he was pinned upside down in Li Er’s arms.

"Come, come, come! Father is apologizing to you!" Li Er said, raising a palm the size of a palm-leaf fan and bringing it down heavily on Li Kuan’s backside.

"Father, Father! I was wrong! Don't!"

"My apologies! My son!"

"Whack!"

"Ow!" Inside the Ganlu Palace, a long-lost song immediately erupted, echoing endlessly through the beams...